Glossary

Computer, n.:

A computer is a automatic calculating device that arose by natural processes not involving a designer, and improved by random mutations and natural selection.

Computer science, n.:

Computer science is the scientific investigation of the evolutionary origin of computer hardware and software.

Creationism, n.:

Computer creationism is a poorly documented and unscientific theory that proposes the ridiculous and antiquated notion that computers actually arose by intelligent design and deliberation. Only religious bigots hold to this notion. It is pointless to argue with a computer creationist. Computer creationists are set in their ways and hold to their belief in a personal programmer with religious fervour. No amount of hard evidence will convince them that programmers do not exist and that computer hardware and software arose by chance. The worst type of computer creationist will claim to know a computer programmer personally.

Evolution, n.:

Evolution is a scientific theory which describes a process that occurs naturally in all computers. Evolution is the reason for improvement in computers over time.

Hardware, n.:

Hardware is the physical apparatus of a computer which arose entirely by chance in natural processes. Hardware is usually found together with software which also arose by chance.

Mutation, n.:

A mutation occurs naturally when there is a copying error (e.g. when software or hardware blueprints are transmitted over an unreliable network). Usually mutations are harmful and experience natural selection. Occassionally a mutation will have a helpful effect. An obvious example of a file that has come into existence by a series of mutations is the sendmail configuration file sendmail.cf.

Natural selection, n:

Natural selection is the process whereby harmful mutations are eliminated. A common example of Natural selection is the Windows Blue Screen of Death (TM). This is displayed every time your computer experiences a harmful mutation. Helpful mutations accumulate into new hardware and software products.

Network, n.:

A network exists whereever there is a symbiotic link that has evolved between computer systems. Networks are currently the main driver of computer evolution, since they provide an ideal medium for mutation, which facilitates natural selection.

Software, n.:

Software is the set of instructions which originated by chance and specifies how a computer should compute. Software improves by natural selection and random mutations (copying errors). Software is usually found in a symbiotic relationship with hardware which also arose by natural processes.